Modelling-how hard can it be?
For me, modelling life in it's best sense, can be really hard. Why? Because it requires me to live by a set of standards I often don't feel like living up to. Selfish, slack attitude? Probably. Well yes, it is a slack attitude laced with frustration and impatience.
I've lost count of the times I've tried to complete this post but the right thoughts eluded me for ages. Adding to this frustration, we recently had a monster storm and of course our computer didn't like it one bit. Eventually our IT expert fixed this weird problem. I wondered if it was a fairly easy problem for him to fix. I mean, how hard can that be? Another dumb question I should never ask.
The churning of my mind and belly over our wretched computer was like a tub of boiling oil itching to erupt at the slightest provocation. Especially if it's about computers. I'm modelling behaviour alright but not the sort that I know will do me or anyone any good. So, [deep sigh] once more I know to take time out to refresh myself of my life values. Those principles and behaviours I know are right for me. I admit this is not a simple one-off event, although that would be convenient.
Perfection is not what I'm after. I've tried that-it doesn't work. But Excellence does. When I'm thinking more clearly, I know that Excellence is doing the best I can on the day with what I've got. This is difficult to accept on good days. On not-so-good days, it's about as funny as a snake bite. It is always easier to live with the acceptance of Excellence than the disappointments of Perfection. One way or another I'm modelling my life. I wonder how tomorrow will go.